Interesting list... though I don't really like it.
I don't have a BA codex... so I don't know alot about the HQ or Death Mask... but I will say this, get a Pred w/ Lascannon or 2.
Why? Well... your dreads don't make for very good tank-hunters, and you have melta bombs, but only 1 per squad (if I read that right), and thats not very good if you fight a armor heavy army, like IG, or a fast army like Eldar or Tau.
Anyways... that's my two cents... you need more armor.
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