it had all been going rather well for funkundie, right up until the point that someone filled his lungs with smoke. recovering from a coughing fit that shook the rafters with its intensity, the ogryn came to the conclusion that it was well past time for another drink or three. still sputtering funkundie made his way back to the bar, ignoring even the most determined assults upon his person as only 10 feet of walking muscle with a serious thirst on can. when he got to the counter his spirits deflated even more. the barman had woken up!
"urg" said the dazed barman, "what the bloody hell happened?"
"deres a bit o a game goin on, a real good one too. looks like you been playin but not doin very well" replied funkundie, "can i ava drink?" he added hopefully
"not till someone tells me what happened to the bastard that hit me" said the barman, "and then tells me why theres a bloody fight in my bar and nobody thought to call the arbites. oi you, put that chair down! no not on his head!! don't touch that its very valueable!!! STOP TRASHING MY BAR YOU SONS A BIT...!!!!"
" but i realy need dat drink", fukundie interrupted "you see dere was dis lil runt wiv a smoke fingy and it got all in me lungs and now i needs a drink to wash da taste outa me mowf so i'll be needin dat drink now" he finished feeling he anger rising.
"NO!!" screamed the irate barman, unawear just how close he was to a world of pain "these idiots are destroying my livlihood and all you want is a poxy drink? get the hell out of here you fool, the bar's closed!"
now, if there's two words that should never be uttered within earshot of a thirsty ogryn, its "bar's closed". seconds after they had left the barmans lips the bar itself exploded into a shower of splinters and mass of enraged funkundie! the furious ogryn chased the terrified barkeep the length of the mangled counter, caught him and proceeded to pummel the understanding of his mistake into the poor sod with two hairy ham sized fists. funkundie then calmly poured himself a drink and cleared his throat with it, climed onto the ruins of the counter and launched himself back into the brawl. |