[Captain Slow]

Cheers for the input people.
I'll try my best to take everything on board in future projects, as for the description..i know. i know. both parts of this stroy were more or else a kind of "Would'nt it be cool if..." project, if i do anything in the future i intend to do it right. but i doubt ill want to make them much longer than this in terms of story length (not how long the story is, but how much as happened in the story from start to finsih) that way i can see what people think, includeing myself and see if i want to carry on with it.

as for the future, im throwing around a few ideas for anouther section of story, this time however using a nice chunk of description and dreary drab settings. after all, reading about bunnies and sunshine is all good and fun, but the best storys IMHO are were the bad guys are not 2D but 4D and the settings are heavyly laced with atmosphere and that horrible sense of forbodeing as the Read trundels along through the story. almost of a kind of "ITS BEHIND YOU" thing going on.

well, ive said to much. hope that gives you some hints as to where im going next with this.