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Old 01-15-2008   #121 (permalink)
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Default Re: 40kTerra Novellette idea.

Chapter 3 (Part 2)
The Warmaster

“You have no idea how important this is, we've been expecting you for a long time...I mean, before Eisenhorn sent us the communique declaring your imminent arrival. It was said that you would return with mighty warriors from times past!” Steele exclaimed, making no effort to conceal the excitement that gripped him. They were still inside the transport, gathering what they needed before they left. Steele and Icarus were being escorted to the dock by two Guardsmen, Rosenadel and the others were being escorted by their own guards.

“And why is that? How did you know what happened?” Icarus asked. He had already taken in the height and length of stride of Steele. He was tall, 6' 4'' by Icarus' reckoning, with a long stride to go with it, though not overly. He deemed Steele a confident, intelligent man, though he was not cautious, and for this Icarus felt some scorn. A leader of men, no doubt, but definitely not a strategist. He was probably a line officer, and may never become anything else.

“Me..? I did not know. Nobody knew what had happened until our leader examined the records,” Steele stated in a manner which reminded Icarus of the Imperium, the blind loyalty which had held it together. Perhaps his measure of Steele's confidence and intelligence had been wrong, now he seemed lacking the latter but with the former in abundance.

“And you believed this?” Icarus enquired.

“Of course I did, we all did,” Steele answered irritably.

“Was there any evidence to suggest this leader of yours was correct? I mean, before we arrived,” Icarus added when Steele raised an eyebrow.

“Well, no, but he seemed so sure...” Steele replied, unable to find a logical reason to believe his leader. “But anyway,” he continued, “It has turned out to be true!”

Before Icarus could reply, they were walking down the ramp into a docking bay full of frantic preparations. “What is happening?”

“It's a war exercise, Centurion,” a voice said from the side of the ramp. Icarus turned as he reached the deck. “I must ask you to come with me.”

“But the Inquisitor, he is not here yet,” Icarus pointed out.

“He was sent ahead with the Grey Knights you brought, Centurion.”

“Very well.” Icarus fell into step behind the man who had addressed. He wore the uniform of a General from Krieg. Stocky and well built, he radiated power, but had little in the way of swagger. He looked intelligent and capable, a good soldier. “Who are you, General?”

“I am Baron von Lexus, of the 501st Death Korps, Centurion,” the Baron replied in an almost dead, emotionless tone. Nothing about him gave anything away. Devious, Icarus thought, before remembering his most recent companion, the Inquisitor.

“Where are we going?”

“To the Strategium, where we shall have to discuss the implications of your arrival.” They turned through winding corridors, similar, if not identical, to those Icarus had been used to in the past.

“Implications?” the Custodian enquired. For once he was truly puzzled, how could their arrival have implications?

“You have come into contact with the Alliance, yes?” the Baron asked, still walking at a constant pace.

“Indeed, we were taken into the midst of one of their fleets.”

“Then they know of your existence, which is bad for us.”

“In what way, Baron?”

“You shall find out in the Strategium, but to fill you in, the Alliance controls all of Imperial space pre-M42. Every planet you have ever visited is under their control.” The Baron stopped, and turned in a perfect 180 degree half circle to face Icarus.

“Humanity?” Icarus asked, holding Baron von Lexus' gaze with an unnatural glare. It became apparent to the surrounding Guardsmen that the Baron had not turned, but that Icarus had spun him round in one deft, unnoticed movement.

“They survive. Terra is now the capital of the Alliance, Mankind co-rulers alongside the Eldar, Tau, Tyranids and others...” the Baron trailed off as Icarus' glare became hostile. He turned, and continued walking. They saw out the rest of the journey in a cold, uncomfortable silence.

Entering an anti-chamber of sorts, they came back into contact with Rosenadel and the Grey Knights. Almost immediately, and equerry came in through an opposing entrance, a pair of extremely ornate gates set in an arch.

“The Warmaster shall see you now,” he said simply, before leaving again, allowing the gates to shut. Icarus glanced sideways at Rosenadel, who did likewise to him. They were not surprised, though, as the title Warmaster was a common one during times of war, but it was said to be cursed, having once been bestowed upon the traitor Horus, shortly before his galaxy spanning Heresy.

“When you enter, do not bow to the Warmaster. He prefers to see himself as one of his men. Indeed, do not be surprised if he bows to you. He is treating your arrival as some sort of miracle,” said Baron von Lexus. Icarus thought he could hear a hint of envy enter the man's voice as he spoke, and Rosenadel nodded discreetly. He would have to watch him carefully.

The Baron stepped forward and pushed open the gates. He strode in, and the five Imperials followed, Rosenadel at their head. They found themselves in a massive hall, adorned with decoration. Paintings of famous Imperial victories adorned the walls, statues of the both famous and infamous participants in the Imperium's millennia long history stood in rows, infront of the space between paintings, creating an aisle. At the end of the aisle was a circular table, with a holographic projection, similar to the one Eisenhorn had shown Rosenadel, above it. Men sat round the table, with only one fully turned so his back was facing them.

He was very tall, and thick set. Adorning decorated robes and with a laurel wreath upon his head, this man had to be the leader that the Guard had been so eagerly telling Icarus about. The man who had made the prophecy of their return. He held the answers, and as they approached him, Icarus swore to himself that this man would reveal the secrets of this event to them.

The Warmaster turned to face them. “Hello, my friends! I am glad that you have arrived, precisely when I expected, as well! I am the Warmaster of the Imperium.”

Icarus raised his eyebrow and cocked his head as his eyes rested upon an eerily familiar face.
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Old 01-15-2008   #122 (permalink)
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Default Re: 40kTerra Novellette idea.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Dragoon King View Post
Hey, can I make a cameo as the Daemon Prince Orcus? (Love that name, Orcus. A cookie to anyone who can tell me what it means!)
something to with whales...

I assume it comes from the latin word Orcus, i, of the 2nd declesion...
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Old 01-15-2008   #123 (permalink)
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Default Re: 40kTerra Novellette idea.

Wow I love it mate... I'm a freaking Krieg General!!

Just read the whole thing and I love it. I'm definitely subscribed and will be watching this.
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Old 01-15-2008   #124 (permalink)
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Default Re: 40kTerra Novellette idea.

Could someone proof read it? Look for mistakes (Grammar, punctuation etc) and also very close repetition of verbs and adjectives.

Thanks in advance.
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"Man, when perfected, is the best of animals, but when separated from law and justice, he is the worst of all."
~Aristotle

"Must not all things at the last be swallowed up in death?"
~Plato
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Old 01-15-2008   #125 (permalink)
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Default Re: 40kTerra Novellette idea.

Ohh ya so you know the full name it's: Lord Baron Jürgen Ulrich von Lexus. and i still think that its really cool that I'm part of this.

If you need any help let me know.

BvL
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Old 01-18-2008   #126 (permalink)
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Default Re: 40kTerra Novellette idea.

I'm going to post a revised edition of the entire story, if the Admins don't mind. It'll also make it easier for one to read it in it's entirety.
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My favourite quotes:

"There is something infantile in the presumption that somebody else (parents in the case of children, God in the case of adults) has a responsibility to give your life meaning and point."
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"Man, when perfected, is the best of animals, but when separated from law and justice, he is the worst of all."
~Aristotle

"Must not all things at the last be swallowed up in death?"
~Plato
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Old 01-18-2008   #127 (permalink)
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Default Re: 40kTerra Novellette idea.

Certainly... YOu can post a revised edition where I can lock the thread for you. That way we can suggest and hash out the topics and such of the new chapters HERE as they are posted, and once they satisfy you, you can edit the master thread and update it, so others can read it in it's entirety! It'll also make it easier to read and see how it(the pieces) fits, etc..
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Old 01-18-2008   #128 (permalink)
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Default Re: 40kTerra Novellette idea.

Thanks, Erus. I'm revising it just now...it's taking longer than anticipated, lol.
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My favourite quotes:

"There is something infantile in the presumption that somebody else (parents in the case of children, God in the case of adults) has a responsibility to give your life meaning and point."
~Richard Dawkins


"Man, when perfected, is the best of animals, but when separated from law and justice, he is the worst of all."
~Aristotle

"Must not all things at the last be swallowed up in death?"
~Plato
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Old 01-21-2008   #129 (permalink)
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Default Re: 40kTerra Novellette idea.

Quote:
Originally Posted by masterofweirdness View Post
something to with whales...

I assume it comes from the latin word Orcus, i, of the 2nd declesion...
Roman god of the underworld. I'll give ya half a cookie.
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Old 01-22-2008   #130 (permalink)
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Default Re: 40kTerra Novellette idea.

*Steals the other half*

Ahahahaha! Nobody jacks my thread!
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My favourite quotes:

"There is something infantile in the presumption that somebody else (parents in the case of children, God in the case of adults) has a responsibility to give your life meaning and point."
~Richard Dawkins


"Man, when perfected, is the best of animals, but when separated from law and justice, he is the worst of all."
~Aristotle

"Must not all things at the last be swallowed up in death?"
~Plato
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Old 01-22-2008   #131 (permalink)
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Default Re: 40kTerra Novellette idea.

Meh, as long as I don't show up as some form of ravenous cannon-fodder I'll be fine... JK

I'll see about giving it a proper proof-read once you have it all put together.
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Old 01-22-2008   #132 (permalink)
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Default Re: 40kTerra Novellette idea.

Look through the Triangulum thread, the revised version of the story. It's got my own corrections, but I'm sure I'll have missed something.
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My favourite quotes:

"There is something infantile in the presumption that somebody else (parents in the case of children, God in the case of adults) has a responsibility to give your life meaning and point."
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"Man, when perfected, is the best of animals, but when separated from law and justice, he is the worst of all."
~Aristotle

"Must not all things at the last be swallowed up in death?"
~Plato
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Old 01-22-2008   #133 (permalink)
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Default Re: 40kTerra Novellette idea.

+++No, I am infinitely quicker without an organic+++

Remove the no here.


He wasn't at all disturbed by the fact he was finding it difficult to come to terms with it. Quite the reverse, actually.

(you might be able to expand on the reverse bit, or else switch actually for something else. As it is, it seems a bit casual for a third person narrative.)

He was used to the smog and pig iron of the Imperial Hive Cities, and the ugly steel subterranean
factories that played home to criminal underworlds, and the interrogation room, much like the medicae unit and, now he thought, the hangar, made him uneasy. It was the sterility. It was unnatural. Like someone had allowed a sea of some liquid flow through the entire ship.


Not sure about this. A sea of some liquid what? Does he feel some sort of suppressed discomfort at the sight of the sterile surfaces?

Neither The Milky Way, nor this galaxy, belong to the Imperium of Man...anymore.”


Me and my race are descended from a very large brood of Tyranid Warriors your Imperium called Tyranicii Preafectea.”

Given the educated tone that Arkot seems to display My race and I might be better here.

All I have so far, I'll re-read the rest later and see what I can come up with.
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Old 01-22-2008   #134 (permalink)
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Default Re: 40kTerra Novellette idea.

I've made some changes as you suggested, and some of my own. Thanks, by the way. I'm too busy to read and re-read this all the time.

EDIT-By the way, Ides. Are you reading from this thread or Triangulum, because the latter has a revised version on it, in which some corrections have been made already.
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My favourite quotes:

"There is something infantile in the presumption that somebody else (parents in the case of children, God in the case of adults) has a responsibility to give your life meaning and point."
~Richard Dawkins


"Man, when perfected, is the best of animals, but when separated from law and justice, he is the worst of all."
~Aristotle

"Must not all things at the last be swallowed up in death?"
~Plato
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Old 01-22-2008   #135 (permalink)
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Default Re: 40kTerra Novellette idea.

I want an update. It's just getting really interesting.
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Old 01-22-2008   #136 (permalink)
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Default Re: 40kTerra Novellette idea.

Do I get a cameo? From what I read, it looks good. I can proofread if ya want, I'm pretty good at it.
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Old 01-22-2008   #137 (permalink)
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Default Re: 40kTerra Novellette idea.

The triangulum version. These are just the things that occur to me as I'm reading.
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