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03-11-2007
| #1 (permalink) |
| Filthy, Dirty Radical      Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: lost in a blizzard, somewhere near toronto!
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|  the bad, the silly and the just plain foolish! well, as many of you know, i am one of those brave and valient few idiots who have taken up the challenge to become an on-ice hockey official. i am the enemy of every player, coach and parent who of corse know the (NHL!) rules far better than us poor refs... well, i figured it's about time i share with all of you some of the silly, jaw-dropping, and uttlerly innane things i've seen and heard after 8 years! my favourite has to be the tykes (4-6 years) & novice (7-8 years) house leaguers; - their skates are 2-3 sizes too big but as the parents say 'well it was a great deal so they my daugther can wear 4 extra pairs of socks untill she grows into them!' (if they break their ankel in the meantime, well that's part of the sport right?!) - the poor kid's helmet is likewise far too big and covers their eyes quite effectively, but as mum & dad say, 'well this way it also covers their kneck too!' (seeing what one's doing for some reason doesn't seem important to the average parent these days...) - the stick is a senior sized blade because little jullie's older brother also plays, so why buy more sticks when she can use her 15 year-old brother's old stick?! (obivously the stick blade being the same size as the 5 year-old trying to use it isn't a clue to some people...) but hey, these kids are indeed cute and would no doubt have alot more fun and learn more if their equipment actually fit them properly!!! another fun thing about these little leaguers is that when two of them run into eachother, 20 or more angry parents start yelling about the obvious 'intent to injure' and 'bodychecking' needing to be called... (because aparently a 6 year-old who's never skated before is a malicious menance who enjoys inflicting pain and suffering on others?!!) a few other very common things i've heard/put up with from coaches & parents officiating these two age groups; - "why can't my daugther play goalie with those road hockey pads?! i did tape them up for her." - "really ref, does a 7 year old truely have to wear a neck guard? since when can these kids shoot a puck that high and that hard?!" (hint: neck guards are not for deflecting pucks... but just maybe a skate blade???) - "well i just bought my daughter this stick so can she use it tonight and i'll cut the extra 2' off it for next time?" - "that was a shity call dumb@$$" (and that one really was from a 7 year-old player!  )- "moron", "idiot" & "lazy @$$" seem to be quite popular comments from the stands! ah! such fond memories... no wonder so many first year refs quit! (who wants to put up with getting yelled at constantly?!) i'll get into some of the more innane/stupid things later!  (yes, that's right, this is truely tame behavior sadly...)cheers!
__________________ "Who are you to question my methods?! A 'Puritan' is simply a coward who hides behind a veil of pretended faith and denounces his loyal brother as a traitor out of simple jealousy!" - Inquisitor Odion   |
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03-11-2007
| #2 (permalink) | |
| the age of insects   Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: Pelossus Alida
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 | dang stitch, sounds like you're getting quite a beating..but then again, you are invincible...just use the four arms/blasters you have and beat the heck out of jerks :] good luck with reffing though, it's a very respectable title :] -ant
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03-12-2007
| #3 (permalink) |
| Confused and Enraged   Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: South-east Ireland
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| Poor misfortunate Stitch... Just keep acting for their little charade and remember that one day you will lead an army of overkitted and undersized 6 year olds on a quest for world domination.
__________________ Don't complain about that which you can change. Change it yourself or it won't change at all... As for that which is unchangeable. Stop complaining, you're annoying me...  Vote On The Battlefield |
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03-12-2007
| #5 (permalink) |
| The Ruler of Earth  Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: Good old England!
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| I'm sorry for what you have to put up with Stitch! But being a reff is a commendable job, you must have the patience of a saint! I look forward to laughing at some more of these soon!
__________________ By trying we can easily learn to endure adversity -- another man's, I mean. - Mark Twain  |
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03-12-2007
| #6 (permalink) | |
| Filthy, Dirty Radical Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: lost in a blizzard, somewhere near toronto!
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| Quote:
a few weeks ago, i was working a peewee 'AA' game, (11-12 year olds). the markham team was clearing burlington's zone because of a delayed off-side. one of the markham players who was still clearing the attacking zone, saw that a burlington player was about to get the puck, shot the puck back into the corner. she knew that she was off-side and had purposely prevented burlington from gaining an advantage they should have had, so i called her team for an 'intentional off-side' which brought the face-off all the way back into markham's end! the second i blew my wistle and said "all the way", (meaning the face-off in markham's end!) i thought the arena's roof was about to blow with all the uproar from the markham bench & spectators! so of corse i had to go explain the reason for the call to the markham coach, who obviously thought i was full of it and had no clue what i was calling... mind you, i figured that the markham parents especially were just plain stupid after the second time they threw the explitive comments my way when i waved off an 'icing the puck' call because burlington was serving a penalty and thus were short-handed... (meaning they can ice the puck all they want untill they're back to full-strength!) cheers!
__________________ "Who are you to question my methods?! A 'Puritan' is simply a coward who hides behind a veil of pretended faith and denounces his loyal brother as a traitor out of simple jealousy!" - Inquisitor Odion | |
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03-12-2007
| #7 (permalink) |
| The Ruler of Earth Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: Good old England!
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| Heh...laughing sometimes does make all the difference... You're always wanting food from us...why don't you take it from the ignorant parents who would dare oppose the mighty Stitch? It would make much more sense...
__________________ By trying we can easily learn to endure adversity -- another man's, I mean. - Mark Twain |
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03-12-2007
| #8 (permalink) |
| Adeptus Arbrites  Join Date: Oct 2006
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| wow....be it hockey, travel leage soccer, rec basketball or (my personal favorite) wrestling, sports parents are the stupidist people on the face of the planet. several stories for you guys......... i am a little league soccer ref (cant ref older teams. not old enuff) stitch, i feel your pain one time, i kicked a kid out because he had been fouling all game, obvious fouls too, like elbowing someone and (i found out later) breaking their nose. so i carded him and sent him on his merry way. the kids mom ((soccer moms......ugh......when i see a minivan i want a lascannon)) storms out of the sidelines and starts screaming at me about how that was a bull$^*! call and stuff like that. her face got beet red and i thought she was going to start swinging. i started laughing. maybe not the best decision....... she went to slap me and i caught her hand and told her to sit down, and the coaches came over and took her away. it was the funniest thing ive ever seen. a ***-wee soccer game for the emporers sake.... ok. wrestling. ive wrestled for about 7 years, and something like this has happened only this time. i was kicking this kids %*& and being rough, but not hurting him. its wrestling...cmon....anyway i was pinning this kid in a double arm bar, where their arms are bent behind their back so their elbows are almost at the middle of their back, and he is laying on his shoulders, legs in the air. so once i had him down he started crying. ((wuss, why are you wrestling!! this is high school!! suck it up!!)) his dad, on the sidelines, runs out and starts kicking me. in the middle of the match. KICKING ME!!! the ref TACKLES him. (which was funny) and hes freaking out, so the ref pins him on his stomach. he eventually calms down but someone had called the cops. and my team never got the points for pinning him, cause 'technically the match never ended, though we had to call it due to circumstances beyond our control bla bla bla....' thuroughly pissing me off. but now you have to laugh at it. |
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03-12-2007
| #9 (permalink) |
| The Omnissiah    Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: UK
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  | Ha, that's crazy, both of you. Now stitch, I can believe all that you say, but Dan, the dad kicked you?!? That's, well.. Crazy!!! Just get stitch to eat any unruly parents; "what did you do that for you...." RARR... Gobble Gobble... After hearing all your American/Canadian antics, I'm just glad I live in England. We are alot more civilised (joking)
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03-12-2007
| #10 (permalink) | |
| One of strangess  Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: Turn around... (if I'm not there I'm usually in Bangladesh)
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| Dan... thats sad. Stitch, I feel for you, they would have to throw me out of the game... I have anger issues with stuff like that. Here, we have cricket... actually, its agrue over whether or not the ball hit the wicket (errm... chalk on the walk/pile of bricks)... I kid you not, the spend most of the game arguing, and at the same time messing up my study time! Luckily, I don't play sports, and, generally speaking, don't really care about sports that much, the only thing I really enjoy watching is American Football, but all I get here is Sunday Night and Monday Night, plus the superbowl... so its sorta hard to bother to watch it.
__________________  Proud member of the FSBGEBS: Feed Stitch Before Getting Eaten By Stitch, Protecting the 40kterra community from a ravenous Stitch. My Blog, my life, my strangeness My WRFP campaign blog! He is no fool who gives that which he cannot keep, to gain what he cannot lose - Jim Elliot Quote:
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03-13-2007
| #11 (permalink) | |
| Master Procrastinator   Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: As a figment of my own deranged imagination, i don't actually exist anywhere. Or London, UK.
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Blog Entries: 1 | the only sport i was ever interested in is rugby, and after getting knocked out in the field by someone a foot taller than me (i'm about 5'7") the only times i get into a game is when its on tv and i'm not! definatly not a game for the faint hearted! for those of you on the other side of the pond and who don't know, rugby is similar to american football but you can only pass backwards and you don't wear armour!
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 Howling At The Moon - A Truescale Space Wolf W.I.P Black Legion W.I.P Frozen Leaves Falling to Cut - eldar W.I.P | |
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03-13-2007
| #12 (permalink) | ||
| One of strangess Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: Turn around... (if I'm not there I'm usually in Bangladesh)
Posts: 1,880
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| Quote:
Hence, why rugby players are a bit... erm... unstable.... lol. I know people who love rugby... American Football is much more fun.
__________________ Proud member of the FSBGEBS: Feed Stitch Before Getting Eaten By Stitch, Protecting the 40kterra community from a ravenous Stitch. My Blog, my life, my strangeness My WRFP campaign blog! He is no fool who gives that which he cannot keep, to gain what he cannot lose - Jim Elliot Quote:
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03-13-2007
| #13 (permalink) |
| The Ruler of Earth Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: Good old England!
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| I'd agree with that... American football is much more fun to watch. Shame that as I live in England and just get basic TV I only get to see the Superbowl and the games leading up to it. And Dan, the guy kicked you? Insane!!
__________________ By trying we can easily learn to endure adversity -- another man's, I mean. - Mark Twain |
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03-13-2007
| #14 (permalink) |
| Captain Join Date: Nov 2006
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| Ah rugby...my friends and i came with up with our own version to play in high school (many moons ago I know) called ****by* (in the hitting sense rather than the swearing one, which wouldn't have made much sense really). Basically like rugby there was no armour and you could only pass backwards, but with a rather homicidal twist in that you could 'attack' any player whether they had the ball or not. After many an enjoyable lunchtime was had knocking each other senseless we had to give it up after I was knocked unconcious...twice. So we moved on to Ultimate Tennis*...which is a story for another time. *copyright |
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03-18-2007
| #15 (permalink) |
| Adeptus Arbrites Join Date: Oct 2006
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| ultimate tennis....interesting....but yes. the guy ran up and started kicking me. it was the weirdest tournament i have ever been in. another story from that tourny. one wrestler had taken a laxitive to be in a lower weight class (things like this is why i dont wrestle in high school) and he....went...on the mat. in another match, a guy was wrestling a girl and she kicked his arse because he, at least after he lost, he 'wasnt sure were to put his hands.' |
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03-18-2007
| #16 (permalink) |
| Corporal  Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: Titan
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| dan all i can say is sue him. sue the damned pants off of him. with dozens of witnesses imagine all the space marines or nids you could buy with the money! you could have a whole hoard of the gribblies or even dozens of carnefexes. thank god the worst i have ever had to deal with is my yelling profanities at a high school foot ball team. at both teams and the coaches and the cops that were pulling me away. (what did i care i got in the game for free for doing parking detail) which reminds me. on parking detail we had this one guy go flying through the police line and ran me over. damn pearl high school parents. and who the hell said the english were normal when it came to sports? you guys are fricken crazy when it comes to futball.
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